60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes to Laugh About (2024)

Which are your favorite motivational quotes?

Is there such a thing as funny motivational quotes?

Of course! I mean, why can’t we have a little fun and be motivated at the same time?

We don’t often feature funny quotes on Wealthy Gorilla, but after compiling this list, I’ll make an exception. Some of the quotes below are pure gold!

Here are 60 short and funny motivational quotes to help brighten your day:

60 Short & Funny Motivational Quotes

1. “When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.” – Unknown

2. “Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.” – Billie Burke

3. “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” – Jeffrey Gitomer

4. “Every tattoo is temporary, because we’re all slowly dying.” – Unknown

5. “I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms.” – Michael Scott

6. “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown

7. “It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.” – Ashleigh Brilliant

8. “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” –Mark Twain

9. “The best things in life are actually really expensive.” – Unknown

10. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers

11. “Well-behaved women seldom make history.” – Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

12th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes

“Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.” – Unknown

13. “A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.” – Mark Twain

14. “Always remember that you are unique  –  just like everybody else.” – Unknown

15. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” –Charles Schulz

16. “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” –Robert Bloch

17. “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde

18. “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” –Steven Wright

19. “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” –Robert Benchley

20. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m possible!” – Audrey Hepburn

21st of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes

“The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” –Albert Einstein

22. “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett

23. “When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard”, I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?”” – Sydney Harris

24. “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright

25. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” – Steve Martin

26. “Bad decisions make good stories.” – Ellis Vidler

27. “Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiots chase them.” – Unknown

28. “Happiness is just sadness that hasn’t happened yet.” – Unknown

29. “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” –Louis Agassiz

30. “If the world didn’t suck we’d all fly into space.” – Unknown

31. “Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower

32. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” –ThomasEdison

33. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time.” – Joe Girard

34. “Think like a proton. Always positive.” – Unknown

35th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes

“When I’m sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson

36. “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” –Jack London

37. “A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” –Unknown

38. “Be happy  –  it drives people crazy.” – Unknown

39. “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” –Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

40. “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” – Franklin P. Jones

41. “I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.” – Benjamin Franklin

42. “If you let your head get too big, it’ll break your neck.” – Elvis Presley

43. “Life is like a sewer–what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” –Tom Lehrer

44. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar

45. “The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.” – Unknown

46. “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.” –Mae West

47. “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite

48. “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” –Sam Levenson

49. “A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.” – Justin Sewell

50th of 60 Funny Motivational Quotes

“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost

51. “Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers

52. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realise I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

53. “I have a simple philosophy: Fill whatis empty. Empty what is full. Scratch where it itches.” –Alice Roosevelt Longworth

54. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” –Betty Reese

55. “Live each day like it’s your second to the last. That way you can fall asleep at night.” – Jason Love

56. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – Winnie the Pooh

57. “The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand

58. “Trying is the first step toward failure.” – Homer Simpson

59. “Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.” – Marilyn Monroe

60. “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” – Robin Williams

Which are your favorite short and funny motivational quotes? Leave a comment below.

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Ernest Miller Hemingway was an American novelist, short story writer, and journalist. His economical and understated style had a strong influence on 20th-century fiction, while his life of adventure and his public image influenced later generations.

Here’s our collection of wise and honest Ernest Hemingway quotes:

47 Ernest Hemingway Quotes

1. “A man can be destroyed but not defeated.” – Ernest Hemingway

2. “Courage is grace under pressure.” – Ernest Hemingway

3. “Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.” – Ernest Hemingway

4. “I’m so in love with you, that there isn’t anything else.” – Ernest Hemingway

5. “Never confuse movement with action.” – Ernest Hemingway

6. “Sometimes following your heart means losing your mind” – Ernest Hemingway

7. “The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.” – Ernest Hemingway

8. “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” – Ernest Hemingway

9. “When people talk listen completely. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway

10. “You are so brave and quiet. I forget you are suffering.” – Ernest Hemingway

11. “All things truly wicked start from innocence.” – Ernest Hemingway

12. “Every day above earth is a good day.” – Ernest Hemingway

13. “I don’t live at all when I’m not with you.” – Ernest Hemingway

14. “Isn”t it pretty to think so?” – Ernest Hemingway

15. “Never go on trips with anyone you do not love.” – Ernest Hemingway

16th of 47 Ernest Hemingway Quotes

16. “Stop chasing the wrong one. The right one won’t run.” – Ernest Hemingway

17. “The world breaks everyone, and afterwards, some are strong at the broken places.” – Ernest Hemingway

18. “There is nothing to writing. All you have to do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.” – Ernest Hemingway

19. “When you stop doing things for fun you might as well be dead.” – Ernest Hemingway

20. “You can’t get away from yourself bymoving from one place to another.” – Ernest Hemingway

21. “All thinking men are atheists.” – Ernest Hemingway

22. “Every day is a new day. It is better to be lucky. But I would rather be exact. Then when luck comes you are ready.” – Ernest Hemingway

23. “I drink to make other people interesting.” – Ernest Hemingway

24. “It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters in the end.” – Ernest Hemingway

25. “Never mistake motion for action.” – Ernest Hemingway

26th of 47 Ernest Hemingway Quotes

“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” – Ernest Hemingway

27. “The world is a fine place and worth the fighting for and I hate very much to leave it.” – Ernest Hemingway

28. “To let with them. Nothing hurts if you don’t let it.” – Ernest Hemingway

29. “Why did they make birds so delicate and fine as those swallows when the ocean can be so cruel.” – Ernest Hemingway

30. “An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.” – Ernest Hemingway

31. “Every man’s life ends the same way. it’s only the details of how he lived and how he dies that distinguish one man from another.” – Ernest Hemingway

32. “I had learned already never to empty the well of my writing.” – Ernest Hemingway

33. “Live the full life of the mind, exhilarated by new ideas, intoxicated by the romance of the unusual.” – Ernest Hemingway

34. “No matter what else you have in your head I’m with you and I love you.” – Ernest Hemingway

35. “The first draft of anything is sh*t.” – Ernest Hemingway

36. “There are only two places in the world you can live happy: At home and in Paris.” – Ernest Hemingway

37. “We ate well and cheaply and drank well and cheaply and slept well and warm together and loved each other.” – Ernest Hemingway

38. “Write drunk, edit sober.” – Ernest Hemingway

39. “Being against evil doesn’t make you good.” – Ernest Hemingway

40. “Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth” – Ernest Hemingway

41. “I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?” – Ernest Hemingway

42. “My only regret in life is that I did not drink more wine.” – Ernest Hemingway

43rd of 47 Ernest Hemingway Quotes

43. “Only those who are prepared to go too far can possibly know how far they can go.” – Ernest Hemingway

44. “The fun of talk is to explore.” – Ernest Hemingway

45. “There is no friend as loyal as a book.” – Ernest Hemingway

46. “We’re stronger in the places that we’ve been broken.” – Ernest Hemingway

47. “Write hard and clear about what hurts.” – Ernest Hemingway

Which are your favorite Ernest Hemingway quotes? Leave a comment below.

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Leonardo da Vinci was a famous Italianartist and intellectual of the Italian Renaissance who’s known for his enduring works ‘The Last Supper’ and ‘Mona Lisa’.

He was born in Vinci, Italy, in 1452, and passed away in France, in 1519.

Here’s our collection of 48 beautiful Leonardo da Vinci quotes:

48 Leonardo da Vinci Quotes

1. “A beautiful body perishes, but a work of art dies not.” – Leonardoda Vinci

2. “Art is never finished, only abandoned.” – Leonardoda Vinci

3. “Experience does not err. Only your judgements err by expecting from her what is not in her power.” – Leonardoda Vinci

4. “I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.” – Leonardoda Vinci

5. “It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.” – Leonardoda Vinci

6. “Life well spent is long.” – Leonardoda Vinci

7. “Once you have tasted the taste of sky, you will forever look up.” – Leonardoda Vinci

8. “Simplicityis the ultimate sophistication.” – Leonardoda Vinci

9. “The painter has the Universe in his mind and hands.” – Leonardoda Vinci

10th of 48 Leonardo da Vinci Quotes

“Wisdom is the daughter of experience.” – Leonardoda Vinci

11. “A painter should begin every canvas with a wash of black, because all things in nature are dark except where exposed by the light.” – Leonardoda Vinci

12. “As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death.” – Leonardoda Vinci

13. “He who is fixed to a star does not change his mind.” – Leonardoda Vinci

14. “I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. It’s the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.” – Leonardoda Vinci

15. “Just as a well-filled day brings blessed sleep, so a well-employed life brings a blessed death.” – Leonardoda Vinci

16. “Life without love, is no life at all.” – Leonardoda Vinci

17th of 48 Leonardo da Vinci Quotes

“One can have no smaller or greater mastery than mastery of oneself.” – Leonardoda Vinci

18. “Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.” – Leonardoda Vinci

19. “There are three classes of people: those who see, those who see when they are shown, those who do not see.” – Leonardoda Vinci

20. “You can have no dominion greater or less than that over yourself.” – Leonardoda Vinci

21. “A wave is never found alone, but is mingled with the other waves.” – Leonardoda Vinci

22. “As you cannot do what you want, want what you can do.” – Leonardoda Vinci

23. “He who thinks little errs much.” – Leonardoda Vinci

24. “In time and with water, everything changes.” – Leonardoda Vinci

25. “Learning is the only thing the mind never exhausts, never fears, and never regrets.” – Leonardoda Vinci

26. “Make your work to be in keeping with your purpose.” – Leonardoda Vinci

27. “Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.” – Leonardoda Vinci

28. “Tears come from the heart and not from the brain.” – Leonardoda Vinci

29th of 48 Leonardo da Vinci Quotes

“There is no object so large but that at a great distance from the eye it does not appear smaller than a smaller object near.” – Leonardoda Vinci

30. “You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand.” – Leonardoda Vinci

31. “A well-spent day brings happy sleep.” – Leonardoda Vinci

32. “Beyond a doubt truth bears the same relation to falsehood as light to darkness.” – Leonardoda Vinci

33. “He who truly knows has no occasion to shout.” – Leonardoda Vinci

34. “Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind.” – Leonardoda Vinci

35. “Learning never exhausts the mind.” – Leonardoda Vinci

36. “Nothing can be loved or hated unless it is first understood.” – Leonardoda Vinci

37. “Poor is the pupil who does not surpass his master.” – Leonardoda Vinci

38. “The knowledge of all things is possible.” – Leonardoda Vinci

39. “When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.” – Leonardo da Vinci

40. “All our knowledge has its origin in our perceptions.” – Leonardoda Vinci

41st of 48 Leonardo da Vinci Quotes

“Every action needs to be prompted by a motive.” – Leonardoda Vinci

42. “I have always felt it is my destiny to build a machine that would allow man to fly.” – Leonardoda Vinci

43. “It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things.” – Leonardoda Vinci

44. “Life is pretty simple: You do some stuff. Most fails. Some works. You do more of what works. If it works big, others quickly copy it. Then you do something else. The trick is the doing something else.” – Leonardoda Vinci

45. “Obstacles cannot crush me; every obstacle yields to stern resolve.” – Leonardoda Vinci

46. “Realize that everything connects to everything else.” – Leonardoda Vinci

47. “The noblest pleasure is the joy of understanding.” – Leonardoda Vinci

48. “Why does the eye see more clearly when asleep than theimaginationwhen awake?” – Leonardoda Vinci

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Thanks for viewing this collection of the best Leonardo da Vinci quotes!

Which are your favorite Leonardo da Vinci quotes? Leave a comment below.

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Andrew Carnegie was a Scottish American industrialist who led the enormous expansion of the American steel industry in the late 19th century. He is often identified as one of the richest people, as well as one of the richest Americans ever.

Carnegie built a leadership role as a philanthropist for the United States and the British Empire. Before he passed away, hegave almost $350 million to charities, foundations, and universities. In today’s economy, that money would have been worth around $78 billion.

Here’s our collection of empowering Andrew Carnegie quotes:

47 Empowering Andrew Carnegie Quotes

1. “A sunny disposition is worth more than fortune. Young people should know that it can be cultivated; that the mind, like the body can be moved for the shade into sunshine.” –Andrew Carnegie

2. “And the law of competition may be sometimes hard for the individual but it’s best for the race because it ensures the survival of the fittest in every department.” –Andrew Carnegie

3. “Every act you have ever performed since the day you were born was because you wanted something. Aim for the highest and when it’s a question of God’s almighty spirit. Never say I can’t.” –Andrew Carnegie

4. “I did not understand steam machinery but I tried to understand much more complicated mechanism; – man.” –Andrew Carnegie

5. “It is the mind that makes the body rich.” –Andrew Carnegie

6. “No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself or get all the credit for doing it.” –Andrew Carnegie

7. “Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.” –Andrew Carnegie

8. “The men who have succeeded are men who have chosen one line and stuck to it.” –Andrew Carnegie

9. “There is no class as pitiably wretched as that which possesses money and nothing else.” –Andrew Carnegie

10th of 47 Andrew Carnegie Quotes

10. “You cannot push anyone up a ladder unless he is willing to climb a little.” –Andrew Carnegie

11. “Aim for the highest.” –Andrew Carnegie

12. “As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.” –Andrew Carnegie

13. “He that cannot reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot. he that dare not is a slave.” –Andrew Carnegie

14. “I resolved to stop accumulating and begin the infinitely more serious and difficult task of wise distribution.” –Andrew Carnegie

15. “Mr. Morgan buys his partners, I grow my own.” –Andrew Carnegie

16. “No person will make a great business; who wants to do it all himself or get all the credit.” –Andrew Carnegie

17. “The average person puts only 25% of his energy and ability into his work. The world will take off its hat to those who put in more than 50% of their capacity and the world will stand on its head for those few and far between souls who devote 100%” –Andrew Carnegie

18. “The secret of happiness is renunciation.” –Andrew Carnegie

19. “Think of yourself as on the threshold of unparalleled success. A whole, clear, glorious life lies before you. Achieve! Achieve!” –Andrew Carnegie

20th of 47 Andrew Carnegie Quotes

“You must capture and keep the heart of the original and supremely able man before his brain can do its best.” –Andrew Carnegie

21. “All achievements, all earned riches have their beginning in an idea.” –Andrew Carnegie

22. “Concentrate your energy, your thoughts and your capital.” –Andrew Carnegie

23. “I began to learn what poverty meant. It was burnt in my heart then that my father had to beg for work and there came the resolve that I would cure that when I got to be a man.” –Andrew Carnegie

24. “I shall argue that strong men conversely know when to compromise and that all principles can be compromised to serve a greater purpose.” –Andrew Carnegie

25. “My motto is concentration. First honesty; then industry and then concentration.” –Andrew Carnegie

26. “People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents.” –Andrew Carnegie

27. “The first man gets the oyster, the second gets the shell.” –Andrew Carnegie

28th of 47 Andrew Carnegie Quotes

28. “The secret of success lies not in doing your own work but in recognizing the best person to do it.” –Andrew Carnegie

29. “Watch the costs and the profits will take care of themselves.” –Andrew Carnegie

30. “All honor’s wounds are self-inflicted.” –Andrew Carnegie

31. “Do your duty and a little more and the future will take care of itself.” –Andrew Carnegie

32. “I believe that the true road to per-eminent success in any line is to make yourself master of that line.” –Andrew Carnegie

33. “I would as soon leave my son a curse as the almighty dollar.” –Andrew Carnegie

34. “No amount of ability is of the slightest avail without honor.” –Andrew Carnegie

35. “Success can be attained in any branch of labor. There’s always room at the top in every pursuit.” –Andrew Carnegie

36. “The man who acquires the ability to take full possession of his own mind may take possession of anything else to which he justly entitled.” –Andrew Carnegie

37th of 47 Andrew Carnegie Quotes

“The wise man put all his eggs in one basket and watches the basket.” –Andrew Carnegie

38. “Whatever I engage in, I push inordinately.” –Andrew Carnegie

39. “And here is the prime condition of success, the great secret. Concentrate your energy, thoughts and capital exclusively upon the business in which you are engaged in. Having begun in one line, resolve to fight it out on that line; to lead in it. Adopt every improvement, have the best machinery and know the most about it.” –Andrew Carnegie

40. “Don’t look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.” –Andrew Carnegie

41. “I can’t afford to pay them any other way.” –Andrew Carnegie

42. “Immense power is acquired by assuring yourself in your secret reveries that you were born to control affairs.” –Andrew Carnegie

43. “No man becomes rich without himself enriching others.” –Andrew Carnegie

44. “Surplus wealth is a sacred trust which its possessor is bound to administer in his lifetime for the good of his community.” –Andrew Carnegie

45. “The man who dies rich dies in disgrace.” –Andrew Carnegie

46. “There is little success, where there is little laughter.” –Andrew Carnegie

47. “When I did big things, some large corporations like the Pennsylvania Railroad Company were behind me and responsible party.” –Andrew Carnegie

Which are your favorite Andrew Carnegie quotes? Leave a comment below.

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