Last Updated on November 1, 2023
You know that feeling, right? When the weekend bliss reluctantly gives way to the dreaded Monday morning alarm.
Well, I’ve been there, snoozed that!
But you know what? Mondays don’t have to be all gloom and doom. In fact, they can be downright hilarious.
So, in this collection of 120 funny Monday quotes, I’m here to put a smile on your face and give you that extra pep in your step to conquer the week ahead.
Now, let’s dive in!
Table of Contents
Funny Monday Quotes
“If Monday had a face, I would give it a high-five… with a chair.”
“Monday: The day that tests my survival skills, caffeine intake, and patience, all at once.”
“When life gives you Mondays, make it a comedy show.”
“Monday is the day that turns coffee into a lifeline.”
“On Mondays, I’m like a kid in a candy store, but the candy is coffee.”
“Monday, the day when my alarm clock is the most hated gadget in the world.”
“If Monday had a theme song, it would be ‘I Will Survive.'”
“If Monday were a person, we’d have a serious talk… and maybe a laugh.”
“Monday is the day that gives me a full workout – from rolling my eyes to sighing loudly.”
“When in doubt on Monday, just add more coffee.”
“On Mondays, I’m 90% coffee and 10% dry shampoo.”
“Monday is the day when my to-do list has its own to-do list.”
“Monday, the day that makes my patience shorter than my coffee breaks.”
“Coffee doesn’t ask silly questions; coffee understands – especially on Mondays.”
“Monday is the day that requires a magnifying glass to find my motivation.”
“Monday: The day when I consider renaming my Wi-Fi to ‘Motivation.'”
“Monday is the day when I question the choices that led me to this alarm clock.”
“If Monday had a scent, it would be ‘freshly brewed desperation.'”
“Monday, the day when my brain is on ‘low power mode.'”
“Monday: The day when my cat is the most productive member of the household.”
“If Monday were a sport, I’d be a world champion at ‘avoiding it.'”
“If Monday were a person, I’d say they have a great sense of humor… the twisted kind.”
“Monday, the day when ‘happy hour’ is just code for ‘more coffee.'”
“Work on Monday is like trying to find a needle in a haystack, while the haystack is on fire.”
“Monday: The day when I try to remember where I left my motivation.”
Short Funny Monday Quotes
“Monday is the day that reminds me that nothing good happens before coffee.”
“Monday, I’m not ready for your nonsense.”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.”
“When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.” – Ella Woodword
“Monday is the day that laughter is the best caffeine.”
“I don’t want to brag, but I made it through Monday without crying.”
“Monday, please be a shortcut to Friday.”
“I have a love-hate relationship with Monday. I love to hate it.”
“Monday is the day that challenges your caffeine tolerance.”
“Monday is the day that requires a serious dose of humor.”
“Coffee first. Adulting second. Dealing with Monday last.”
“Monday is the day that feels like it lasts a week.”
“Monday is the day that my coffee needs coffee.”
“Coffee + Monday = Survival mode.”
“Dear Monday, my coffee is not strong enough for you.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“Don’t mess with anybody on a Monday. It’s a bad, bad day.” – Louise Fitzhugh
“Monday is the day that makes me question my life choices.”
“I’m allergic to Mondays. They make me sneeze coffee.”
“I don’t need therapy; I need a vacation from Monday.”
“Monday is the day that gives you 101 reasons to procrastinate.”
“Coffee and Monday: A match made in survival.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.” – Steven Wright
“Monday: The day that teaches you to appreciate Saturday.”
“If Monday had a face, I’d punch it.”
Funny Monday Quotes for Work
“Monday is the day that tests my computer’s ‘will to work’.”
“Coffee and deadlines: the Monday morning essentials.”
“Monday is the day when my desk looks like a post-apocalyptic wasteland.”
“On Mondays, my coffee is so strong it can almost carry my workload.”
“Monday is the day when my calendar says ‘work,’ but my brain says ‘vacation.'”
“Monday: The day where ‘do not disturb’ should be my job title.”
“My boss asked me what my weekend plans were. I said, ‘Surviving Monday.'”
“If Mondays were shoes, they’d be crocs – comfortable in the weirdest way.”
“If Monday had a mascot, it would be a sloth with a ‘Not Today’ sign.”
“Monday: The day when my keyboard’s ‘I’ and ‘U’ keys start having issues.”
“Work on Monday feels like trying to run underwater – slow and exhausting.”
“On Monday, I dream of a world where emails don’t exist.”
“Monday, the day that turns coffee into survival juice.”
“Work on Monday is like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.”
“Work on Monday: It’s a marathon, not a sprint, and I’m the world’s slowest runner.”
“Monday is the day when my inbox is like a never-ending episode of ‘Whack-A-Mole.'”
“Monday: The day when I play hide-and-seek with my motivation.”
“On Mondays, my computer takes longer to wake up than I do.”
“Monday: The day when my ‘to-do’ list laughs at my ‘done’ list.”
“Monday is the day when I perfect my art of ‘looking busy.'”
“Monday: The day when ‘five more minutes’ is the difference between ‘on time’ and ‘late.'”
“When life gives you Monday, make it a double espresso and laugh at the chaos.”
“Monday is the day that requires the ‘Ctrl+Alt+Del’ approach to life.”
“Monday: The day when ‘I’ll do it later’ becomes ‘I’ll probably forget to do it.'”
“Monday: The day when my coffee cup gets filled more often than my inbox.”
Sarcastic Monday Quotes
“On Mondays, I like to add some drama to my life by pretending I have it all together.”
“Monday: The day when I gracefully slide from ‘dreamy weekend mode’ to ‘harsh reality mode.'”
“If Monday had a personality, it would be the party pooper at a birthday bash.”
“Monday is the day that whispers, ‘Hey, remember all those things you didn’t finish last week? They’re back.'”
“On Mondays, I practice my ‘pretending to care’ face.”
“Monday: The day that makes me appreciate the joys of adulthood, like bills and responsibilities.”
“If Monday were a flavor, it would be ‘bland’ with a hint of ‘ugh.'”
“On Mondays, I have so much energy… for sarcasm.”
“Monday: The day when even my coffee can’t believe how early it is.”
“If Monday were a movie, it would be a never-ending documentary on ‘Adulting 101.'”
“Monday is the day that tests my acting skills; I pretend to be awake and enthusiastic.”
“On Mondays, I’m like a superhero with a cape made of procrastination.”
“If Monday were a person, I’d unfriend it faster than a Facebook troll.”
“Monday is the day that brings back all those ‘I should’ve done that on Sunday’ regrets.”
“If Monday were a weather forecast, it would be ‘cloudy with a 100% chance of me not caring.'”
“Monday is the day when I’m as enthusiastic as a sloth in a marathon.”
“On Mondays, I do my best impression of a ‘well-rested’ person.”
“Monday: The day when I debate whether ‘adulting’ is worth the trouble.”
“If Monday were a pet, it would be a grumpy cat that refuses to be trained.”
“On Mondays, I contemplate whether ‘casual pajama day at the office’ is a viable option.”
“Monday: The day when I question the life choices that led me to this alarm clock.”
“Monday: The day when my brain files for ‘mental vacation.'”
“On Mondays, my calendar says ‘work,’ but my heart says ‘go back to bed.'”
“Monday: The day when ‘pretending to be a responsible adult’ is my top skill.”
“Monday is the day that reminds me why weekends should be seven days long.”
Hate Monday Quotes
“If Monday had a face, I’d punch it.”
“Monday is the day that tests your commitment to the weekend.”
“Dear Monday, I want a refund.”
“If Monday had a fan club, I definitely wouldn’t join.”
“I’m on the ‘see no Monday, hear no Monday, speak no Monday’ program.”
“Dear Monday, go step on a Lego.”
“Monday: because nothing ruins your weekend like the reminder that it’s over.”
“Monday: the day that feels like it’s 72 hours long.”
“Why do Mondays happen every week? Can’t we negotiate this?”
“Monday should be optional, like a side quest in a video game.”
“Monday: the day I can’t adult, even if I wanted to.”
“Monday, I’m not ready for you. Can we reschedule?”
“Is it Monday again? I swear I just did this last week.”
“Monday, you’re like a bad penny that keeps turning up.”
“Monday, you’re like an unwelcome guest who stays for too long.”
“I need a vacation from Mondays.”
“I’m not anti-Monday, but I am strongly pro-Sunday.”
“Monday, I’ll tolerate you, but don’t expect a warm welcome.”
“Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday.”
“Monday is the day when my bed feels 10 times cozier.”
What’s Next?
Mondays might not be everyone’s favorite day of the week, but they sure do inspire some creative humor.
If you’ve enjoyed these funny Monday quotes, you’ll probably appreciate my other blog posts about weekly quotes. Whether you’re looking for a pick-me-up on Tuesdays, some midweek motivation on Wednesdays, or a dose of Friday fun, I’ve got you covered.
Read More
- Tuesday Quotes
- Thursday Quotes
- Friday Quotes
- Saturday Quotes
- Sunday Quotes
Happy reading, and may your week be filled with humor and joy!
